John Cenaaaa

You can't see me but I can see you, says John Cena

Parang sa pag-ibig lang, hindi ka niya laging nakikita pero siya lang yung nakikita mo.

Bakit ganun ang pag-ibig?

Gusto mo siya pero di ka niya gusto.

May nagkakagusto sa'yo pero hindi mo gusto.

Gusto mo, gusto ka pero di kayo pwede.

Bakit sa dinami-rami ng taong pwedeng malasin sa pag-ibig,

bakit ako pa?

Hindi na lang yung mga taong sure ng single forever?

Hindi na lang yung mga taong sure na na magmamadre?

Bakit ako pa na hindi pa sure?

Nalilito tuloy ako sa buhay ko.

Am I for married life?

Am I meant to be single forever?

Am I for religious life?

I once have had decided to be single,

but f*ck life, f*ck destiny.

Bakit kung kailan nakapagdesisyon na ako na gusto kong mabuhay mag-isa hanggang sa ako'y mamatay

saka pa ako nagkagusto sa'yo?

Dun pa sa taong ayaw sa'kin.

Sabi nga sa kanta, "We had the right love at a wrong time ..."

Everything is in wrong timing.

Hindi ko alam kung ikaw na ba?

Hindi ko alam kung sino ba?

Ikaw yung gusto ko pero ayaw mo.

Hindi ko siya gusto pero siya yung laging andiyan.

Kailan ba magiging tama ang panahon?

Kailan ko ba masasagot yung mga katanungan ko?

Yung alam kong tama, pinagdududuhan ko na.

Yung alam kong mali, pinaniniwalaan ko na.

Ganito ba ang umibig?

Lilituhin ka, lolokohin ka

Hanggang sa mamanhid ka na lang.

Hanggang sa hindi mo na alam yung tama at mali.

Hanggang sa makalimutan mo na yung mga pinaniniwalaan mo,

yung mga prinsipyo mo,

yung mga taong totoong nagmamahal sayo.

Sino ba papakinggan ko?

Yung puso kong sinisigaw yung pangalan mo?

O yung utak ko na sinasabing ayaw mo.

Pinakinggan ko yung puso ko pero anong napala ko?

Pinakinggan ko yung utak ko pero nasasaktan ako.

Alam kong ayaw mo pero sana wag naman tayong ganito.

Alam kong ayaw mo pero please dahan-dahanin natin 'to.

Alam kong wala naman talaga akong pag-asa sa'yo,

tanggap ko na. Iba ang iyong gusto.

Pinapatalon mo yung puso ko tuwing nagkikita tayo.

Pero hindi na ngayon.

Ito ba ang iyong gusto? Ang lumayo ako?

Hindi ako pwedeng magselos kahit kanino kasi hindi naman tayo.

Hindi kita aalalahanin kasi wala namang tayo.

Wala ka namang pakialam kung magkagusto ako sa iba

Dahil ito yung gusto mo, ang lumayo ako.

PEKWA: An Annual Artificial Intelligence Competition

This year’s battle focused on a card game called Pekwa. It is a common card game among Filipinos, a game of chance, a game of cards. This is a battle of strategies, tactics and algorithms. October 16, 2015 Friday was the day AI students, handled by Mrs. Ria A. Sagum, have been waiting for. Sections BSCS 3-1, 3-1N and 3-3 have been busy for weeks in preparing their agents for this battle. Algorithms will be the key for winning. Whose agent will it be? What algorithm will stand against the other?

Professor Ria A. Sagum appointed two representatives per section namely, Mr. Rostum Joseph Selga and Mr. Marc David Camungol from BSCS 3-1, Mr. Wreigh Christian Santos and Mr. Kim Clarence Peñaflor from BSCS 3-1N and Mr. Owen Ulysses Enguito and Mr. Ezekiel Joshua Cajano from BSCS 3-3. These representatives made the competition possible by making the UI and reassuring that all the agents were working. Officers of the three sections became the organizers of the event who helped each other and had also been busy for the preparation of the whole event, the programme proper, the type of tournament, who will battle who, foods, tarpaulin etc., and was led by the overall coordinator, Ms. Veinn Geomai Aquino.

Everything was set. Everyone was excited. The thirty four agents were ready for battle. Three computers were set for the competition and three LCD screens were set for the audience. An opening remark from the overall coordinator signified the start of the competition and let the battle begin. Nine agents battled first and so on. Each members of the team cheered for their agents, crossing their fingers and hoping that their agents would win their every battle. Every win were replaced by screams of the winning group signifying their joy and excitement. Agents tried their best to win the game but only three remain tough and clever and only one had defeated all the other thirty four agents. Winning second place MinimaxMan Agent having a Minimax algorithm (by Mr. Cedie Justine Baquing, Mr. Justine Dela Cruz, Mr. Ace Javier and Ms. Patricia Anne Napalit) from BSCS 3-3. WeAreFive Agent (by Mr. Joeyboy Robles, Mr. Marc Simon Rancio, Mr. Edward Joseph Villa, Mr. Erwell Rabino and Ms. Coleen Cayetano) having Greedy Algorithm from BSCS 3-1N won the first place. Finally the champion of this year’s competition, Pekwaman Agent from BSCS 3-3 having an Alphabeta Pruning algorithm (by Mr. Rad Renzo Reveche, Mr. Mark Angelo Montesa, Mr. Carl Ian Jonathan Angeles and Mr. Jonathan Elli Vergara). Certificates and recognitions and closing remark were given by Mrs. Ria Sagum to end the programme. Ms. Mariz Genelyn Jose and Ms. Jemma Regina Ogbinar were the masters of the programme. Battle between agents and algorithm has been settled. See you until the next battle.

The one that started it all

"Ang pag-ibig ay parang imburnal. Nakakatakot mahulog pero kapag nahulog ka na, it's either an ACCIDENT o TANGA ka lang talaga."  (ctto)

I tried to ask myself a hundred times. Am I really in a state of love? What is the definition of love for me? Am I ready for this? Is the right time? The right guy? Is this for real or just a product of me being hopeless romantic? Or am I just infatuated by this random guy? I don't know.

"Infatuation is falling in love with or becoming extremely interested in someone or something for a short time. If you have an infatuation with a particular singer, you probably listen to her on repeat all day long, at least this week." (c) http://www.vocabulary.com/

I met this guy 2 years ago. I never thought that I would feel something for him at the first place. Hindi naman kasi siya recognizable eh. Hindi siya takaw atensyon. For me, he is just another guy from our section. Until one day, I returned to school from being absent for two days. I noticed him. We became one of the loveteams sa section namin. Hindi naman sa nag-assume pero he became a gentleman that is very recognizable by his actions. This happens regularly tapos lagi pa kaming magkasabay pauwi. To cut the long story short, naattach ako sa kanya. Until one day, di ko na alam. I fell for him. I thought he felt the same way.

Nagkahiwalay na kami nung college but I tried to do stupid stuffs para makasama, makausap o makita siya. Dami kong palusot para makita siya. Pinupuntahan ko siya sa school niya. Okay lang naman kasi dumadaan naman talaga ako dun on my way home. Until sa di malamang kadahilanan, hindi na kami laging nagkakachat tapos ang cold niya pang sumagot. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. I tried to find someone like him sa school but all of them were a failure. No one was like him.

I invited him on my 18th birthday. It was fun. Alam mo yung feeling na, I stayed in their room just spend more time with him kasi I really missed him. Hindi na nga ako pumupunta sa room ng mga classmate ko nun eh. Like duh? One year ko siyang hindi nakita. Medyo nakakairita lang nung may kausap siya sa telepono. LIKE DUUUH!??? Nandito ako. F*ck. Within a month, I kind of feel that he has a girlfriend. Nafifeel ko. I posted an excerpt from a book. Nagcomment siya, for the first time in forever.

Him: Di ako manloloko.

Me: Feeling -___-

H: Di kaya.

M: K. -___-" Di ka naman gwapo para maging manloloko.

H: Porket may girlfriend na ako ganyan ka ka hard? :))

...

Sakit. Hindi ko na alam irereact ko jan hanggang ngayon ang sakit pa rin. Yung everytime I see something  that reminds me of him natatahimik na lang ako. Everytime I hear his name kahit na hindi naman siya yung tinutukoy, natatahimik na lang ako. Siguro nga, it hurts the most when you have regrets. Dami kong sana. Maybe it wasn't him that hurts me the most but the memories we shared. He was the first guy that the made me feel I was special (next to my father, of course).

Maybe that was the reason na kapag nafifeel ko na mahuhulog na naman ako, mas mabuti ng i-detach ko yung sarili ko. It won't hurt as much as nung naramdaman ko dati. Maybe he wasn't the right guy. Maybe it wasn't the right time. Maybe it was just an infatuation and not love at all. Maybe I wasn't ready to commit to someone that will eventually leave me at some point of time. Maybe I was just  too scared to get hurt and not to fall in love. But what if I tried? Who knows what will happen? Too late to ask this kind of question. May girlfriend na siya and I can feel it he loves her so much. The end.

It's the only way

" Jhing: I was scared of investing more feelings. I was scared of getting hurt. I was scared of loving him knowing he can't do the same " 23:11

Oo. Aamin ako. Natatakot na ako. Ayoko na. I've always been in a situation wherein I was the only one who's in pain. Nagsasawa na ako. I know that life is full of disappointments. Hindi naman ako nagsasawang magmahal pero gusto ko namang magpahinga. This letter is for you. Sana ito na rin yung huling blog ko na tungkol sa'yo.

Hi!

Hindi ko na kailangan sabihin kung sino ka. You know who you are and as I go on with this letter alam ko magegets mo ring para sa'yo 'to. Wag kang pabebe huh?! Kapag nafeel mong ikaw 'to, ikaw talaga 'to.

I really don't know where to start but I guess I have to say sorry. Sorry kasi nasusungitan kita for the past few days. Hindi ko rin kasi maintindihan yung sarili ko ehh. Nadadala na kasi ako sa asar ng tropa ko sa'kin, sa'tin... Alam ko naman wala ka talagang nararamdaman para sa'kin at dala lang matinding imagination ng tropa ko kaya sila nakarating sa ganung conclusion. Pero alam mo yun, pinipigilan ko yung sarili ko na isipin kung ano yung iniisip nila tungkol sa'tin pero di ko talaga kaya. Nakakainis kasi nagkaroon ako ng attachment sa'yo.

Nakakainis. Nakakainis kasi alam ko sa sarili ko that I tried. I tried na layuan ka. Tried not to chat you. Tried not to reply on your messages kaso kasalanan ko pa rin kasi hindi ko kaya... Hindi ko na mabilang sa mga kamay ko kung ilang beses ko ng trinay na wag ka ng i-chat. At hindi ko na rin mabilang sa kamay ko kung ilang beses ako umasa na kahit isang beses lang mamimiss mo ako every time na hindi kita rereplyan. Lupet! Lupet talaga. Ano ba 'tong ginawa mo sa'kin? Nakakainis.

Siguro, tama nga yung utak ko. Siguro nga kailangan sa ganito ko umpisahan yung kailangan kong tapusin. Maraming reason kung bakit. Di ko na iisa-isahin lahat pero ibibigay ko yung sa tingin ko ay dahilan ng confusion ko. Una, takot ako. Natatakot ako na baka mabored ka na nakausap ako and then eventually one day, hindi mo na lang ako kausapin kaya uunahan ko na yung ganung sitwasyon. Pangalawa, I promised myself to rest from all the heartaches. Na ayoko muna ulit magkagusto sa kahit sinong tao. Ayoko muna ulit umasa. Tama na muna yung ginawa sa'kin nung isang unworthy na tao. Lastly, I value friendship more than anything. Hindi ko kayang ipagpalit ang kahit anong bagay sa mga taong unang nagmahal sa'kin. Kahit minsan I felt less appreciated, okay lang. Tsaka alam mo, gustong-gusto ka ng kaibigan ko. As much as I do.

Litong - lito na ako. Hindi ko na alam yung dapat gawin. Mamaya gusto kita. Mamaya ayoko na. Nakakainis. Hindi naman ako naging ganito nun sa kanya. I am very sure about how I felt for him. Siguro kasi maraming nagpapagulo. Maraming kailangan isipin. I read my last blog that is all about you back when I am still sure that I don't feel anything special sa'yo. Narealize na, oo nga nuh? Ito pala yung view ko sa nararamdaman ko para sa'yo dati. I want it back. Gusto kong bumalik sa dati. Yung magkachat tayo pero ang nasa isip is that it is just normal for a girl and a boy to make a conversation without malice. Kailangan kong pigilan yung sarili ko na hindi ka na i-chat. Hirap nun ahh. Yung 1 week ko pa nga lang na hindi ka nakachat, na sineen mo lang ako hindi ko na kaya ehh.Yung hindi ka pa kaya kausapin

#LoveWins not just for you but for everyone

Love wins. Love wins thousand years ago when Jesus Christ died on the cross for the forgiveness of our sins. I'm not against homos, trans, bi, gays, lesbians and the like. Actually, I have a lot of friends who are like this. Being in a situation like that isn't their fault. Hindi nila kasalanan mapunta sa ganyang sitwasyon. Loving is never a sin. Loving is an acceptance, acceptance of the persons whoever he/she might be.

Everyone speaks about the approval of same sex marriage. Everyone speaks their opinion. Everyone has something to say. Some are cons. Some are pros. Some say they understand and others say they don't. Everyone SPEAKS. That's our fault. Does someone at least listen to someone? Does anyone tried to just listen and don't speak for themselves. Everyone held and read the bible and says something but does someone held and read the bible and listen? Does someone really understand what love means?

Love is the little things we do with kindness without asking anything in return.That is my view about love. Love is sacrifice. Love is God. God is love. Marriage is not about proving others that you have a passionate love to your partner. Marriage is a bind that thing called love. Marriage binds you to your partner. Therefore, marriage is a holy sacrament in which God binds you to your partner and that you promise that you'll love each other with God in between.

I don't want to speak for the bible. I might misinterpret what God is saying. I don't want to hurt the bible nazis. *no offense* But, I would like to listen to everybody. God is a loving God. Therefore, I would also be loving as Him. I will not persecute others by their religion, by their faith, by their belief, by their culture, because at the first place God says no religion in the Bible. God accepts everyone even the worse sinner he ever met. He didn't judge. He brought the sinner closer to Him not taking them far from Him. That is love. That is what I view about love.

F A M I L Y

Time check: 12:22 AM of April 27, 2015 Monday

Nainspire akong magsulat ng blog ng ganitong oras because what happened today. Today was a very harsh - slash - happy day or I must say I felt God moving in my life again. Syempre, yung pinakaunang blessing niya sa'min na I DECLARE before this month of April ends mabibigay na sa'min yung matagal na naming samo't dalangin. In God's mercy and compassionate Heart, he'll grant this blessing. Second is He gave us something to realize today. Habang binabasa ko yung caption ko na inupload ko sa Instagram that I shared on Facebook, nainspire ko rin yung sarili ko. Here's what I've said:

"No filters needed. What you see is what you get. This is us.

We might get a hundred of rejections from people whom should accept us more, a thousands of judgments from people whom must understand us more, a million of discouragements from people whom should be leading us to the right track.

Lessons learned. Bring us down but remember we have a God that'll lift us up. You may burn what we have now but you can never take down what God has built within us, the bond that made us one and the FAITH that made us FAMILY"

May mga nagandahan, may mga natamaan. Hindi kumpleto yung nasa picture. Hindi kami maliit na ministry. Hindi rin kami malaki. Sabi nga dun sa pinabasa sa'ming reflection, "God doesn't called the equipped, He equips the called." Masasabi ko na rin na hindi kami somehow equipped because we're too young and naive. Alam ni God that we're easily hurt, we are emotionally and financially unstable, ipapamukha sa'min ng mundo how stupid we are, that we can do nothing but remember that He's doing this kasi gusto Niyang mapalapit tayo sa kanya. Katulad nga ng sinabi ni Ate Charmaigne, look at the brighter side of the struggles that we're encountering right now.

Hindi tayo sikat para magkaroon ng haters but we have, they're God-given. What they say maybe our weaknesses but remember what Paramore had to say, "Somewhere weakness is our strength." We'll prove them wrong by being descendants of Christ, by following His footsteps, by leaving all our doubts and worries to Him and by carrying His cross.

To my Youth Ministry remember what Sigmund Freud had to say, "When you don't like a person, it is because they remind you of something you don't like about yourself." Siguro kaya ayaw nila sa'tin kasi nakikita nila yung wala sa kanila at yun yung BOND natin sa isa't - isa na ginawang matibay ng ating FAITH. Let's try not to hate anybody because I know there's nothing to hate about our ministry. DON'T QUIT, KEEP PLAYING.

END.

Nope! Not him!

Third blog: March 21, 2015 Saturday 8:21 AM

Okay! I don’t know at all how to start this blog. Well, t’s all about a guy that bothers my thought nowadays. It’s not because I liked him or what, it’s just that he’s doing things, I think, a sensible man would do if and only if they like a girl. It’s not that I’m saying that he liked me or what … Waaaah! It’s confusing.

So I’m going to start on how we met. It was a Friday night. Rain is falling, I think there was a storm that time and my friend and I decided to go home together with his friends. My friend liked him undeniably. HAHAHA! I liked him for her unlike her last suitor. I’m bad. HAHA! My friends and he decided to dine at the nearest fast food and wait for the rain to subside. We ordered food. Since I don’t get something free from a stranger, I didn’t let him buy me a free dinner. He offered me to join him homeward. I liked to but my friend disagree. HAHA! She thought I am going to steal her guy. Well, I’m not that kind of friend. HAHA!

The next morning, I received a notification that “Mr. I-Don’t-Know-Who” sent me a friend request but when I looked at my profile there’s no request at all. So I searched that person and it turned out that it was him. So I added him as a friend, I just thought he was just too shy to send a request because it may sound too “FC.” He greeted me on my birthday and that’s how we started our conversation online that is until now we’re still chatting. Walang palya. Araw – araw. Some of my friends tease me na baka daw kami yung magkatuluyan and I’ll just react by saying “kadiri” or I’ll just make face na tila nadidiri ako XD

Marami na sila actually na nang-aasar sakin, they’re saying, “What if kayo talaga nyan yung magkatuluyan?” “Hala? Baka may gusto yan sa’yo” and the like. Well, as for me, magkachat lang kami. No malice at all. We’re friends and that was all I ever was to him and so I am to him. Madalas lang kaming magkachat pero hindi palagi. Panggulo lang talaga ‘tong kaibigan ko that was telling na maybe he liked me because a guy would NEVER talk to a girl for a long period of time unless he likes her or something. Well, para sa’kin, it’s normal. Eh ano? Nag-uusap lang eh. Tsaka hindi nya rin alam yun kasi he never had a girlfriend. So I guess, if he knew that he’ll just talk to me once and never again.

Not all guys are the same. Maybe they get their attitude because of their experience on their past. It’s not because lagi ka niyang kausap ibig sabihin nun may gusto na siya sa’yo. Kaya tayo madalas masaktan kasi lagi tayong nag-aassume ng mga bagay na sobrang layo sa katotohanan or kung hindi naman malayo sa katotohanan, masyado naman nating pinapangunahan yung mga maaaring mangyari. Some of my friend tell me that I’m too negative about my perspective in life but actually I’m not. I just knew how to look at the possibilities that can happen if I do a certain action. Gusto ko kasing maging careful. Ganun ako pinalaki ng mga magulang ko.

It may sound absurd and unrealistic but it happened to some that their first love are their lifetime lover. I also want that for me. Alam niya yun. Yun din gusto niya, so why would I have to think that we’ll be lovers if we weren’t sure of each other? Masyado pang maaga para magdecide at magbigay ng final judgment. Hindi ako naniniwala sa destiny at kung ano-ano pa. I only believed that God has a perfect plan for me. Hindi ko Siya kailangan apurahin sa kung anong kailangan niyang gawin sa buhay ko because I knew He has His own PERFECT TIMING at yun lang dapat ang kailangan kong paniwalaan.